Meet me..........on Thames Street

Sometimes I wish I did not had to deal with the fact that I have lost you. I do still look back, and indulge in reminiscing on the good old times. Much as I have deleted the text messages, ... thrown away most of the things that remind me of you, ... skip the songs that remind me of you should they play next on my iTunes, ... torn away our photographs, ... stop contacting you, I still think of you at times, when I past by places that I have been with you, ... seeing people play your favorite sport, ... hear your name.

I know I know, it's long over. To see you in the face, to act as if nothing had begun at all. The times when we would tell each other dirty little secrets, laugh it out loud. The times, ... when you would just look me in the eyes and you know it well that I'm all of yours.

Is it really so difficult to forget somebody? To wipe them out with sheer determination? Perhaps the science-fantasy fiction clinic in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind should be brought out to reality. "Xabryna Kek, wants to erase ____ ___ from her memories." Wake up, the next day, and everything's gone. What had happened? Only the doctors know. If only, if only.

Ain't love a funny little thing? While one is still tortured by the demons of love memories of the past, the other one, is unfortunately having the time of his life. Whispering sweet nothings, sending mushy text messages, holding each other in embrace, planting kisses, just......repeating the whole love life cycle again. This, is this what we call L-O-V-E? To love, to lose and to love, to lose, to love and to lose and to love again? Or to make up, break up and make up, break up and make up again?

I'll follow thee and make a heaven of hell,
To die upon the hand I love so well.
- William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream.

On love, in sadness. Is this the end product that we all get eventually? Oh, hold on. Maybe the end product we get is not exactly sadness altogether. No doubt, along the way sadness comes fading in and out momentarily. The perhaps ideal way of looking with eyes on the word 'love' is cheat, distortions, lies, deceptions, and pretense.

We do like to drop the topic whenever a particular name is mentioned or brought into the topic. We have been trying hard all the while, to block certain memories. It is not all fault that we are still haunted of our past - because we are all humans, much as we try and appear strong, we are broken. Broken badly deep down inside of us. We resist doing certain things, we attempt to behave in certain manner, we stand up for something, we discourage others in some principles, that is because we all have our pasts. Memories that is only exclusive to us, personally.

I guess, it's sad, really sad that we had to split like that.

Dwindle away, memories.